*sighs* I don't even know where to begin or what I can say, but... here's my story...
So, I slept at my friend Wes' house a week or so ago (with Kelly). I got into major trouble for doing this without an "adult" present (even though all three of us are over the age of 18). I was campused that weekend (which means I couldn't leave my room and visitors (other than my roommate) where prohibited) and received a request to meet with the Dean of Students, Mr. Bruce Morgan. In reply to all of this, I wrote Amanda Allquist (my resident director) a three page letter (see below). As far as I know (from what she's said / alluded to) she has yet to read it. Whatever.
Then... Wes' friend Heather came over. She has a place of her own in downtown Dayton on Main Street. She offered to let us spend the night at her house so we could just hang out as late as we wanted to. Ben Campbell, Rachel Smith, Kelly, Wes, Heather and I all hung out at Wes' until after 2:00. Then the girls (Rachel, Kelly, me & Heather) went over to Heather's place to sleep. Rachel left at 5:30ish because she couldn't sleep. Then we went over to Wes' until our first classes. Then we went back to Wes' to watch a movie.
I recieved ONE call and ONE voicemail from Amanda (who claims to having called me "numerous times" and having left "several messages" while searching for me "all day" even though she was OFF-campus all day). She said she had "something" to give me and to come see her A.S.A.P. So I did this instead of going to Chatty (Chattanooga, TN for all of you Floridians) to see the movie. she informed me and Kelly that she confiscated our sign-out cards until the next day and that she had "proof" that we "for sure" slept at Wes' house the night before. She then proceded to hand me a letter telling me that due to not meeting with Bruce (even though I told him why I wasn't meeting with him and that I was meeting with Liz Mosely (the school counselor), instead), a chapel over-cut and having some unexcused absences, I had two choices. 1.) Have a hearing before the Honor Council (made up of staff, faculty, Amanda, Bruce, students and myself) where they decide my fate or... 2.) withdraw from the school on my own.
Needless to say, I almost WANTED to withdraw, but decided to just go ahead and meet in front of the Honor Council. This will either be this upcoming Monday or the Monday after Thanksgiving. I requested the latter date in the hopes that my parents might be able to be there.
If any of you have any questions, PLEASE contact ME -- no one else. No one is going to be able to explain the full situation to you.
I love you guys -- thank you for reading this... and caring... and being there for me.
Praying for this to all work out for the best,
Rebecca Marie L'Allier
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To: Amanda Allquist
Subject: Response to Campusing
Dear Amanda,
I have a few things I would like to bring to your attention in order to best express my convictions. I strongly disagree with your decision to campus me and would like to contest my current punishment (being campused from November 3 – 5).
First of all, I have done nothing wrong. I slept over at my friend’s house. Yes, he was male. No, we were not alone. No, we did not sleep under the same roof. Yes, there were adults present. Three of them, to be exact: Wesley Callihan (19), me (18), and Kelly McDermott (also 18). If 18 is not the legal age we’re considered adults, then what is? 21? Why? Just so we can drink and smoke? We’re not asking to drink and smoke. Bottom line: I did nothing wrong. And neither did Kelly or Wesley.
Also, I have too many school-related activities going on. I have to go to
On a different note, some faculty members that I have explained this situation to have suggested that I not talk to Bruce since I felt threatened and uptight the several times I met with him, but discuss things with Liz Mosley instead as she is somewhat Bruce’s female counterpart and she knows him well enough to understand his reasoning behind certain matters. Unfortunately, she's not back in the office until the week of the thirteenth of November. I went ahead and made an appointment with her that week. I plan on telling her everything. Until then, I will be carrying on with life as I normally do. If you have anything else you need to discuss with me, please have the courtesy to talk with ME about it; not Jessi, not Dean Morgan, not Kelly--no one else but me. If you truly care about what I am doing and my well-being, you will talk with the one responsible for my actions – me.
If you’ll remember the honor code for a moment, I would like to respectfully submit to you that it appears you broke it when you told me about Kelly's punishment before you had told her and cleared with her that it was okay to tell me. You very easily could have said, "I'm sorry, Rebecca, I can't answer that question right now – Kelly hasn't been approached about this issue, and I would be breaking her confidence if you were to be told about it before I received her permission." Instead you proceeded to tell me regardless of keeping her trust and confidence in mind. She has since told me that if I were anyone else, she would've been upset that you had told me about it. The only reason she didn't mind is because I'm her "best [girl] friend" on the campus.
Another thing that concerns me is the fact that you didn't even find it your responsibility to call me or Kelly when you looked at our cards (that is if you checked the cards that night and not the following morning). If you were truly worried about our well-being, our safety or even our integrity, it seems you should’ve called us. What else would be the purpose of the sign-out cards?
For further reference, my parents, my greatest authority, under God, were fine with me sleeping at my friend's house – whether he slept in his car or not. They trust me and they know my integrity… why can't you see that? And remember that I DID follow the guidelines of the handbook because Kelly and I fell asleep in a different place than Wesley. He slept in the CAR, we slept in the house.
I would also sincerely appreciate that if you ever insist upon punishing me for non-offenses, such as this, that you would have the decency to discipline me privately. Having to deal with the added torture of explaining to others why I was punished for some "crime" I didn't commit (or some non-crime that you claim was, or appeared to be, sinful) is punishment, enough, in and of itself.
May I also point out that you (as well as Dean Morgan) – whether purposefully or inadvertently – have, as touched on at the end of the previous paragraph, tainted my reputation significantly. Fellow students have said to me that people who don't even know me have come to them and told them that I'm on probation for having slept with my boyfriend. Do you see how grotesque that is? I didn't do that. That should be enough for you. To be completely honest, I hold you completely responsible for this, because of your lack of trust in my innocence. Everyone in this country is innocent until PROVEN guilty, BY LAW. God also knows my heart. I ask you this, Amanda: Do you know my heart?
By your actions regarding this situation, you have continued to unfairly imply that there is more bad character within me than is outwardly evident or even factual. You campused me for simply being honest and trying to follow the rules; I told the place where I went last weekend and followed the handbook. By campusing me without reason – again – you have once again added rumors to my reputation. Let me ask you this: In a college environment as small and intimate as
Now, as my closing point: It is my sincere prayer that God would reveal the wisest course of action in this situation. I personally do not believe that campusing me is that course. I pray you understand what it is like to be a student under your jurisdiction. I pray God directs you in this position of authority that you have, and that your gifts could be used to their fullest potential.
Respectfully,
Rebecca M. L'Allier
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